Outside the Confines of My Heart
November 25, 2017
When you are in a season of a battle and all hope is lost, that's when faith steps in.
The last 8 months, practically bedridden, unable to walk and in excruciating pain can bring a girl down. You have to live by faith and hope that there will be healing and an end in sight. Sometimes it is hard to see an end but I am determined to see it soon! It can be hard to see the forest because of the trees. We get so focused on what is right in front of us and do not look up or around to see the big picture or the beauty within the forest in which we are walking.
I am learning much through this journey. You quickly learn who your true friends really are and you rely on those closest to you to help. That is tough when pride steps in. Along the way, I have suffered great losses and great sorrow. I don't always understand but I know that God has never left my side. I am learning to live beyond the confines of my heart! What does that mean? It means all of the hurt, loss and belief systems within my heart will not control me or use me to stay in a place where God does not intend for me to be. I am learning to burn all of those tapes that play constantly over and over that say I am not good enough or unworthy etc.... I am pressed but not crushed, persecuted but not abandoned. I am blessed beyond the curse for His promises will endure! No longer held back and no longer used and discarded. I am allowing myself to have a voice and take care of me. (and it's ok...)
Taking care of yourself is NOT selfish. I have given and given, until there is no sign of me. It is so true when they say to put the oxygen mask on first before assisting someone else. You can not help others if you are incapacitated or dead! Just sayin....
I have been in this place of dying for 8 months....Dying to old beliefs, dying to self and seeing myself as God sees me. Beautiful and capable. Worthy of all He has for me and knowing that He is in control always! I am loved and deeply valued!
I am being truly fed by Him and not letting outside influences control me. (especially food...just keepin it real) I am letting go and letting God! Whatever my future holds, whatever it looks like.... I surrender and choose to live outside of the confines of my heart.
I pray that you too will find your voice and who you truly are and are called to be! Live outside of the confines of your heart. (Whatever that means in your life) You have great value and are deeply loved!
Living Out Loud-